When Drinking Feels Connected to Love, Belonging, and Being Chosen
If you’ve ever worried that stopping drinking will make you less fun, less attractive, or less likely to find your person, this conversation is for you.
In this SSK Member Story episode, I’m talking with my friend Kim, who I’ve known for more than a decade. We met in early sobriety and have stayed connected through years of growth, setbacks, day ones, and hard-won lessons.
Kim shares her experience navigating sobriety while single, dating, and searching for connection. We talk openly about loneliness, self-abandonment, social anxiety, attachment patterns, and the belief that alcohol was necessary to fit in, be desirable, or find love.
Most importantly, we talk about what finally changed.
This conversation is honest, vulnerable, and deeply hopeful for anyone who has spent years going back and forth with alcohol and wondering why it feels so hard to let go.
The Question So Many Women Are Asking
What happens when you realize alcohol isn’t helping you find connection—but may actually be keeping you from becoming the person you want to be?
This Episode Is For You If…
✅ You’ve stopped drinking before but found yourself starting over again.
✅ You worry that dating or finding a partner will be harder without alcohol.
✅ Loneliness is one of your biggest drinking triggers.
✅ You feel embarrassed by how long you’ve been thinking about changing your relationship with alcohol.
✅ You’re wondering whether sobriety can actually help you feel more confident, connected, and comfortable in your own skin.
What You’ll Learn in This Episode
❇️ Why dating alcohol-free can feel scary—and why it may be easier than you think
❇️ The connection between loneliness, belonging, and the urge to drink
❇️ How attachment patterns and self-abandonment can show up in drinking and relationships
❇️ Why many women return to alcohol even after months of sobriety
❇️ What Kim learned from multiple day ones and years of trying to quit
❇️ How confidence grows when you’re no longer waking up with regret, anxiety, and self-doubt
❇️ The role community and support play in creating lasting sobriety
The Shifts That Change Everything 💖
🌸 Sobriety isn’t about becoming someone different—it’s about becoming more fully yourself
🌸 Every alcohol-free stretch teaches your brain something, even if you drink again later.
🌸 The goal isn’t perfection; it’s continuing to learn, adjust, and keep going.
🌸 Feeling chosen by someone else matters less when you start choosing yourself.
🌸 You don’t need more willpower—you need more support
Finding Your Person Starts With Finding Yourself
One of my favorite things about this conversation is that it challenges the belief that alcohol is the thing that makes us lovable, interesting, confident, or connected.
Kim spent years believing she needed to drink to date successfully and find her person. What she discovered instead was that alcohol often pulled her farther away from the life, relationships, and self-trust she wanted most.
If you’ve been caught in the drink-regret-repeat cycle, or if you’ve had more day ones than you can count, I hope this episode reminds you that you’re not behind, you’re not failing, and you’re certainly not alone.
Keep adding support. Keep learning. Keep showing up.
And most importantly—don’t quit quitting.
🎧 More Stories About Dating, Connection & Alcohol-Free Living
🔗 Ep. 313: End Emotional Outsourcing & Overcome Your Codependent, Perfectionist and People Pleasing Habits
🔗 Ep. 301: Why You’re Exhausted, Overperforming, And Drinking To Cope (Anxious Attachment Explained—And How To Feel Secure Instead)
🔗 Ep. 314: Why Are So Many Women In Midlife Questioning Their Drinking?
🔗 Ep. 312: Small Changes To Drink Less And Build A More Meaningful Life
🔗 Ep. 213: How To Stop People-Pleasing In Sobriety
🔗 Ep. 202: How To Overcome Imposter Syndrome Without A Drink
🔗 Ep. 261: How To Overcome Self-Doubt and Navigate Imposter Syndrome (Without Drinking Through It)
🔗 Ep. 235: Single in Sobriety: How To Maximize Happiness, Fulfillment, Joy And Be Your Own Best Life Partner
More from the SSK Member Series:
🔗 Ep. 320: I Was Drinking a Bottle of Wine Every Night and Trying to Hold It All Together
🔗 Ep. 319: From Secret Drinking and Shame to 200 days Alcohol-Free
🔗 Ep. 318: I Had Everything Together Except My Drinking
🔗 Ep. 317: The “I’ll Start Again On Monday” Drinking Cycle – Jessica’s Story
🔗 Ep. 316: From ‘Couch Wine’ to 28 Months Alcohol-Free: Anna’s Story
Laura McKowen Episodes:
🔗 Ep. 274: You Quit Drinking… Now What? How To Live With Purpose in Sobriety with Laura McKowen
🔗 Ep. 151: How to Get Through Sobriety with Laura McKowen
📌 If You’re New Here
About me: I’m Casey McGuire Davidson, a sobriety and life coach for busy sober-curious women and host of The Hello Someday Podcast. Around here we talk stress, careers, kids, marriages—and how to build a life you don’t need to escape from.
If you’re ready for structure, tools, and a community that actually gets you, you’re in the right place. 💛
You’ve got this. And I’m right here with you. 💛
❤️ Ready to stop starting over — and finally break out of the
drinking cycle this summer?
This isn’t just “stop drinking for 100 days and hope for the best.”
The Sober Summer 100 was created to give you actual support for the moments that usually send you back to drinking:
✨ The 5pm cravings
✨ The emotional overwhelm
✨ The “I’ll start again Monday” spiral
✨ The exhaustion of trying to do this alone
Inside the program, you’ll have daily support, live coaching, step-by-step guidance, and a community of women walking through the exact same changes right alongside you.
Because lasting change happens when you stop relying on willpower alone.
☀️ Join today and let me support you this summer with clarity, confidence, coaching and a group of women who get it. 👉 Join The Sober Summer 100 Program Now
Loved This Episode?
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More Ways I Can Support You In Drinking Less + Living More
Save your seat in my FREE MASTERCLASS, 5 Secrets To Successfully Take a Break From Drinking
Grab the Free 30-Day Guide To Quitting Drinking, 30 Tips For Your First Month Alcohol-Free.
Connect with me for free sober coaching tips, updates + videos on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, Pinterest and TikTok @hellosomedaysober.
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Leave me a rating and review on Apple Podcasts!⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
I read every single review and they really help the podcast algorithm decide to share my show with a wider audience.
I’ll be forever grateful to hear from you and to read reviews like this one from Laura,
“I’ve listened to so many sober podcasts and The Hello Someday Podcast is by far THE BEST Sobriety Podcast out there for women. This podcast was key to me quitting alcohol. Casey’s practical tips and tricks are invaluable, with advice I haven’t heard anywhere else. If I could give this podcast 27 stars I would!!”
Connect with Casey
Take a screenshot of your favorite episode, post it on your Instagram and tag me @caseymdavidson and tell me your biggest takeaway!
Want to read the full transcript of this podcast episode? Scroll down on this page.
ABOUT THE HELLO SOMEDAY PODCAST FOR SOBER CURIOUS WOMEN
Are you looking for the best sobriety podcast for women? The Hello Someday Podcast was created specifically for sober curious women and gray area drinkers ready to stop drinking, drink less and change their relationship with alcohol.
Host Casey McGuire Davidson, a certified life and sobriety coach and creator of The 30-Day Guide to Quitting Drinking and The Sobriety Starter Kit® Sober Coaching Course, brings together her experience of quitting drinking while navigating work and motherhood, along with the voices of experts in personal development, self-care, addiction and recovery and self-improvement.
Whether you know you want to stop drinking and live an alcohol-free life, are sober curious, or are in recovery this is the best sobriety podcast for you.
A Top 100 Mental Health Podcast, ranked in the top 1% of podcasts globally, The Hello Someday Podcast is the best sobriety podcast for women.
In each episode Casey will share the tried and true secrets of how to drink less and live more.
Learn how to let go of alcohol as a coping mechanism, how to shift your mindset about sobriety and change your drinking habits, how to create healthy routines to cope with anxiety, people pleasing and perfectionism, the importance of self-care in early sobriety, and why you don’t need to be an alcoholic to live an alcohol-free life.
Be sure to grab the Free 30-Day Guide To Quitting Drinking right here.
Subscribe & Review in iTunes
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I’m adding a bunch of bonus episodes to the mix and if you’re not subscribed there’s a good chance you’ll miss out on those. Click here to subscribe in iTunes!
Now if you’re feeling extra loving, I would be really grateful if you left me a review over on iTunes, too. Those reviews help other people find my podcast and they’re also fun for me to go in and read. Just click here to review, select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” and let me know what your favorite part of the podcast is. Thank you!
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