Holding Your Hand Through A Sober Christmas and New Year’s Eve
So it’s Christmas week with New Year’s Eve right around the corner and you’re not drinking.
- Or you’re trying not to drink
- Or you REALLY want to stop drinking but you’re not sure you’re ready yet
- Or you stopped drinking 6 months ago but DAMN this week is harder than you thought it would be….
What can you do to stay centered and grounded and not dive head first into the sparkly drinks all around you? I’ve got you covered.
I recorded this podcast to hold your hand through Christmas and New Year’s Eve as you navigate our booze-obsessed culture without a drink.
So cuddle up, listen up, go on a walk and let me share my best advice on how to navigate family dynamics and special occasions and drinking events so you don’t wake up tomorrow or Christmas morning or on January 1st with a headache and a hangover.
I’m hoping you will come out of this podcast episode with a little bit of peace about what this week can look like and the things you can do to make small, incremental shifts in your thought process to let yourself feel really good about this week, the memories of this holiday season and how you’re going to start this new year.
In this episode, I dive into:
✅ Why navigating Christmas and New Year’s alcohol-free is hard even if you have some sober time under your belt
✅ The mistakes I made during my 1st Christmas and New Year’s Eve not drinking alcohol
✅ Practical shifts to make and small boundaries you should set with yourself, family and friends
✅ What my Christmas and New Year’s Eve were like when I was drinking, and what they’re like now
✅ New traditions you should start for your alcohol-free New Year’s Eve (including creating your 2022 vision board)
✅ How to set yourself up for success to start 2022 alcohol-free
✅ A special offer to join The Sobriety Starter Kit
Ready to drink less + live more?
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Grab the Free 30-Day Guide To Quitting Drinking, 30 Tips For Your First Month Alcohol-Free
Episodes To Get You Through The Holidays and Guide You Into The New Year
Ep.31: Your Sober Holiday Survival Guide with Jean McCarthy
Ep.37: How to Manifest the Shit Out of Life – Creating a vision board for your new year
4 Ways I Can Support You In Drinking Less + Living More
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Want to read the full transcript of this podcast episode? Scroll down on this page.
ABOUT THE HELLO SOMEDAY PODCAST
The Hello Someday Podcast helps busy and successful women build a life they love without alcohol. Host Casey McGuire Davidson, a certified life coach and creator of The 30-Day Guide to Quitting Drinking, brings together her experience of quitting drinking while navigating work and motherhood, along with the voices of experts in personal development, self-care, addiction and recovery and self-improvement.
Whether you know you want to stop drinking and live an alcohol free life, are sober curious, or are in recovery this podcast is for you.
In each episode Casey will share the tried and true secrets of how to drink less and live more.
Learn how to let go of alcohol as a coping mechanism, how to shift your mindset about sobriety and change your drinking habits, how to create healthy routines to cope with anxiety, people pleasing and perfectionism, the importance of self-care in early sobriety, and why you don’t need to be an alcoholic to live an alcohol free life.
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READ THE TRANSCRIPT OF THIS PODCAST INTERVIEW
Holding Your Hand Through Christmas and New Year’s Eve
SUMMARY KEYWORDS
drinking, day, husband, alcohol, life, feel, night, year, sobriety, people, New Year’s Eve, wine, gruvi, nonalcohol, stockings, kids, mom, red wine, Christmas, Christmas eve, vision board, January
SPEAKERS: Casey McGuire Davidson
00:02
Welcome to the Hello Someday Podcast, the podcast for busy women who are ready to drink less and live more. I’m Casey McGuire Davidson, ex-red wine girl turned life coach helping women create lives they love without alcohol. But it wasn’t that long ago that I was anxious, overwhelmed, and drinking a bottle of wine and night to unwind. I thought that wine was the glue, holding my life together, helping me cope with my kids, my stressful job and my busy life. I didn’t realize that my love affair with drinking was making me more anxious and less able to manage my responsibilities.
In this podcast, my goal is to teach you the tried and true secrets of creating and living a life you don’t want to escape from.
Each week, I’ll bring you tools, lessons and conversations to help you drink less and live more. I’ll teach you how to navigate our drinking obsessed culture without a bus, how to sit with your emotions, when you’re lonely or angry, frustrated or overwhelmed, how to self soothe without a drink, and how to turn the decision to stop drinking from your worst case scenario to the best decision of your life.
I am so glad you’re here. Now let’s get started.
Hey there! Happy December 23, or 24th, or 25th! Or whenever you’re listening to this episode. It is a couple days before Christmas and eight days until the start of 2022. And I know this can be a really amazing time, a really special time and a really difficult time to be alcohol-free. Especially if you’re used to drinking there are typically a lot of parties, a lot of celebrations, a lot of family dynamics that can be kind of difficult, a lot of time at home. And the associations with drinking and alcoholic beverages right now are all around you.
But January is a little over a week away. And January is a time of fresh starts. January is a time to slow down and to think about what you really want for yourself and what you really want in your life. How do you want to feel and who do you want to be, after all the craziness of the end of the new year, January is time to prioritize yourself and take better care of yourself. It is an amazing time to change.
And it’s dry January. So I want to give you an incentive to stop trying harder and beating yourself up and relying on willpower and telling yourself to get it together about your drinking, I want to give you an incentive to get more support and take a step in a new direction.
So you have eight days left you have through the end of the year New Year’s Eve to decide to join The Sobriety Starter Kit Course you get lifetime access.
And you can also save $100 off the course price for the next eight days.
And as a special bonus, you’re going to get invited to attend an exclusive to our live sobriety starter tip course kickoff session with me on January 9.
So if you are interested in changing your relationship with alcohol in the new year, there is literally no better time to jump in. If you think at some point, you’re going to want to stop drinking and you think the course can help you jump in now you get to save $100.
You get the live kickoff with me which will also be recorded, there is no better time and you get lifetime access to the course. So you might be doing dry January with a bunch of girlfriends you can join as a group and do it together and cheer each other on.
You might be doing dry January or saying New Year’s Day is your day to make a change by yourself. And maybe you live in a household where your partner drinks where your family drinks where your friends drink and you need extra support.
You need someone to show you what to do day by day to be in your earbuds to cheer you along. I can do that for you with this course. And we can make it fun and exciting and feel like self-care and feel like the kindest thing you have done for yourself in a very long time.
If you’re wondering what the course is like, here’s what Melanie told me about what she thought of the program. She wrote me and said,
The Sobriety Starter kit is awesome and so different from other programs. I love how Casey frame stopping drinking has not been a doom and gloom situation, but rather as a gift for yourself to get excited about. I just hit four weeks without alcohol. And this course has been a game changer. For me, I am beyond grateful. ~ Melanie
And Morgan told me
This course is awesome and worth every penny. Morgan wishes she’d found my program earlier because it’s 100 times easier to stop drinking with my resources, my guidance, my prompts, and my information.
So if you want a great price on The Sobriety Starter Kit Course, if you want to save $100, you can do that for the next eight days, until New Year’s Eve, and you’ll get the invitation to attend the two hour live kickoff with me on January night to start strong, and keep on going. I know it’s an investment. But the cost of the course the investment in the course.
I saved that amount of money literally in three weeks, not drinking in 21 days not drinking, and I know it’s gonna be worth it to you. So if you want to jump on in, if you want to make this New Year’s Day amazing, and a fresh start with new tools and a new outlook, head on over to www.sobrietystarterkit.com. I would love to see you in the course.
Hi there. This episode is coming out on December 23. So it’s the day before Christmas Eve and Christmas day if you celebrate that. It’s a week before New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day. And I’m going to do something different than what I’ve done in previous episodes.
My goal in this podcast is just to hold your hand through Christmas and through New Year’s Eve. If you have stopped drinking, if you’re in early sobriety, if you’re even in longer term sobriety this week can be hard. And if you’ve been struggling going off again and on again with drinking, sometimes navigating this week without drinking alcohol without getting drunk or fuzzy or hungover the next day can seem insurmountable. And like it’s a fool’s errand like it won’t work anyway, so why bother even trying. So, I would love you to just sit quietly, go for a walk, close your eyes. Listen to this episode. And try to come out of this with a little bit of peace about what your next week could look like and things you could do and really small, incremental shifts you can make in your thought process and your habits and how you spend your time to let yourself feel really good about this week, these memories this holiday season, how you’re going to start this new year.
So if you’re up for that, I want to start by telling you about my first Christmas and New Year’s after I stopped drinking, as well as what some of those times were like when I was still drinking. And to start I stopped drinking on February 18. So by the time I got to Christmas, and New Year’s I was about 10 months alcohol free. I had worked with a sober coach. I had gone through an online program to stop drinking, I’d gone on vacations to Europe, I had gone through my 40th birthday, alcohol free like gone through a holiday party with friends. We always host alcohol free like I thought I was good. And I also think that my husband thought I was good. And other people thought I was good. Like this was going to be no big deal. And I was surprised how difficult and emotional it was that first holiday and it was for a couple of different reasons. Number one, I think I didn’t anticipate it would be difficult and going back and what I tell my coaching clients is just anticipate that any holiday any gathering, anytime you’re doing something for the first or second time where you normally would drink that is going to be hard. So just go back to your sober foundations, the fundamentals to get prepared for it.
So part of that is telling someone that you’re not going to be drinking. Telling someone that it may be hard for you like, I actually think it’s helpful if you have a partner or a friend who’s going to be with you and know that you’re not drinking, it is okay? To tell them it’s hard. It’s okay to tell them. You’re not drinking, but you want to even just verbalizing that can make it easier. I made a couple mistakes. My first year. Number one, my mom was staying with us. And I hadn’t been with her the entire time. I wasn’t drinking, and I love my mom. And with any mother daughter relationship, I think a lot of times there’s some tension there. Like I know, for me, my mom, I went to boarding school, I went to college, she was out of the country, I moved to Seattle, like, literally we have not lived together for any significant period of time since I was 13 years old. So I love having her come to visit. I love having her with my kids. And it’s just a little bit of tension, like I go back to being 13 and having all those emotions. So that was new for me. It was also she hadn’t been there for my whole not drinking journey. So that was new as well. When I was on Christmas Eve, we were having dinner and my husband asked me if it would be okay. If he and my mom had a bottle of red wine with dinner. You know, I was 10 months along, I forget what we were eating. But it was something that apparently goes well with red wine. And I said, Okay, I probably should not have said that. I mean, when I look back, my husband is perfectly happy with beer, my mom could take or leave alcohol. It was just the five of us. We were sitting around a dinner table. And the red wine was just on the table in front of me. While my husband and my mom had glasses of it. I had some old bed that I was very happy with. But red wine was my jam. And it was my “Christmas Eve, too”. And I felt like it was just in my face. And I should have said, you know what? I’d love it if you didn’t drink wine. How about x or y or z? Love my husband and my mom. They are total normies. I could have taken down a bottle of wine in like two hours by myself. It sat there like it sat there through the whole dinner with their glasses like half full. We finished eating dinner and we went to a table to play some kind of a board game with my kids. It sat there throughout the entire board game like in front of me. When I went to take my daughter up to bed, I walked by the bottle picked it up, there was a quarter left and I was like, oh my fucking god, I’m gonna kill myself if I not literally sorry. If I come back downstairs and they still haven’t finished this damn bottle of wine. I went up to put my daughter to bed. I stayed up there a long time. She was like two and a half. And I was texting my sober bestie. And I was like Ingrid, WTF, these guys are drinking wine. I want to rip their heads off. Like, I wasn’t going to drink. It was just like this elephant in the room that I couldn’t take my eyes off of. And then I went back downstairs, and they still hadn’t drank it, like the quarter was still there in the bottle. And so I went over to them. And I was like y’all need to finish this right now. Poured it into their glasses and went up to bed.
The next night on Christmas day. My mother said again, oh, well, we can just have some wine with dinner. And I was like, Nope, we’re done. That’s it, you can have something else like no more wine. And the thing is that both of those things, they were clueless, they were literally clueless, that it was hard for me that it pissed me off that it bothered me. And I could have just had my own back and said something. You’re allowed to even change your mind midway through and be like, you know what, guys? Not loving the wine on the table. Let’s get rid of it. So I would just encourage you to think about you know, we always try to please others, we want to make sure everyone else is happy. Not drinking is a big thing. Your first holiday is a big thing. And it is okay to ask people to drink something else other than your beverage of choice. I personally found it way easier to go to a larger party where people are drinking but I had all my nonalcoholic beverages and my husband was there and my best friend and they both knew I wasn’t drinking. I found that much easier than sitting around a small dining room table with a bottle right in front of me for multiple hours. So figure out what’s hardest for you. But part of this is boundaries. And part of this is setting yourself up for success and changing what you’ve done before.
So it is the 23rd of December maybe you’re listening to this on Christmas Eve, maybe you’re listening to this on Christmas Day or right before New Year’s, you’re allowed to ask for things, you were allowed to change what’s always been done. So, if I could go back, and my husband says, do you mind if I have a bottle of wine at dinner with your mom? I would have been like, you know what? That wouldn’t be ideal. Can you guys just have beer, or I have this Gruvi? nonalcoholic Prosecco? Or we can have this sparkling water or what make a nonalcoholic Mojito? Like, just you know what? No, thanks. No big deal shrug of shoulders. Thank you for asking and being considerate. Like if people are offering to make your life better. Take them up on it. I’ve had clients be like, well, my husband offered to not drink, but I really don’t want to put him out because it’s my deal. I’m like, dude, say thank you say thank you say I appreciate you give them a back rub for fuck sake. Like, you know, it’s all good. People are allowed to make your life easier.
Another thing I remember. And this is us in early sobriety, making this huge change that’s so tied to our identities of who we are, and our fears about having fun and our fears about the future and our cravings. So I was driving back from a dinner party, with my mom and my husband and my two kids. And my son was eight. And we were driving back at night. It was dark. I was driving in the car. And my son said something to me about like, Hey, Mom, do you think you’ve been good this year? You know, he was talking about Santa. And you know, have you been good? Have you been bad yada, yada. And so I was driving along and just started feeling really emotional. And reflecting on the fact that I literally stopped drinking after being a bottle on half a wine girl night, and struggling with it for many, many years and doing all this personal growth, and said to him, I said, Hank, you know what, I think that I have been really good this year, I’ve made some huge changes in my life. And I’m really proud of myself. And it wasn’t easy. And I think that it’s really good for me and my mother, lover, out of nowhere, pipes up from the backseat and said, interrupts me talking to my son, and says, why wouldn’t give yourself too much credit. And literally, you could have heard a pin drop, like the entire car went silent. And in my mind, I’m like, what would it possess someone to pipe up and you know what, I’m sure she wasn’t thinking about it. I don’t know why she interrupted. I don’t know why she jumped in and thought I was like, getting too big for myself when I’m talking to my eight-year-old son, who knows, but it really impacted me. And so like, five longest seconds in the world, goodbye. And God bless my husband, he pipes up and is like, actually, I think she should give herself a lot of credit. This was a really big thing that was good for her and all that stuff. If something like that happened now, I would not have been so hurt so wounded, so upset, but like God, we’re sensitive. We’re like newborn babies. This is big. This is hard.
I went up to my bedroom, I curled up, I cried a tiny bit to my husband, I hope my mother does not listen to this. And I got through it, right. I remember it to this day, but I got through it. And I know 90% of that is about me. So your first holiday, it’s gonna be hard prepare for it. Think it through, tell people it’s gonna be hard have someone to text if you’re in a big Facebook group, a secret private Facebook group, like the BFF he or she recovers, which I love, like, posts, they’re like post and be like, Oh my God, they’re drinking wine at the dinner table. And I literally want to throttle them, because they are drinking it so slowly, I want to kill them, or whatever it is, like all your emotions are valid. And you can post in those groups’ pictures of your wonderful alcoholic free drink. That’s amazing, or your hot cocoa bar. Or the fact that you like remember going to bed and you know washing your face and we’ll wake up without a hangover. All that stuff is good.
Now, even though that Christmas Eve was hard, it was nowhere near as hard as Christmas Eve when I was drinking. So I have, you know, I think we all have those moments that stand out to us as like a particular low, where we sort of beat ourselves up and hate ourselves for drinking too much and all that stuff. And I definitely have one of those on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. And of course sadly It was not my last day, right? It was not the day I stopped drinking. But it has stuck with me to this day and reflecting on some of that actually makes not drinking on these sorts of anniversaries a lot easier.
So, a year, two years before I stopped drinking, the same scenario, my mom was there Christmas Eve, wine on the table. I was definitely drinking. I was drinking while cooking. I probably started late in the afternoon because, you know, holiday celebrating, whatever it was. I think I drank a lot of red wine. Who knows? I don’t, but it wasn’t that unusual because I drink a lot of red wine every night. The deal was though it was Christmas Eve, and sort of my MO what I used to tend to do is just kind of go quiet, and fall asleep slash pass out, right? I wasn’t like, most of the time this loud, embarrassing drunk. I had a lot of sort of gray outs and blackouts and just kind of went to bed. So Christmas Eve, no recollection of going to bed. I don’t know what I said to my mom or my kids. I know. It wasn’t mean I know. I wasn’t upset. I know. I wasn’t dramatic. But like, yeah, it’s just blank. It’s just blank. Here’s what I know. My daughter ran in and my son super, super excited and ridiculously early on talking like 6:00am on Christmas morning. I felt awful. I was brutally hungover. My head was pounding like, I just felt like I could feel every blood vessel in my body pumping. I felt queasy. I was sort of opening when I am being like, in my mind, holy shit. How am I going to handle this morning.
If you’re listening to this episode and have been trying to take a break from drinking, but keep starting and stopping and starting again, I want to invite you to take a look at my on demand coaching course, The Sobriety Starter Kit. The Sobriety Starter Kit is an online self study, sober coaching course that will help you quit drinking and build a life you love without alcohol without white knuckling it or hating the process. The course includes the exact step-by-step coaching framework I work through with my private coaching clients, but at a much more affordable price than one-on-one coaching. And The Sobriety Starter Kit is ready, waiting and available to support you anytime you need it, when it fits into your schedule. You don’t need to work your life around group meetings or classes at a specific day or time. This course is not a 30 day challenge, or a one day at a time approach. Instead, it’s a step-by-step formula for changing your relationship with alcohol. The course will help you turn the decision to stop drinking from your worst case scenario to the best decision of your life. You will sleep better and have more energy, you’ll look better and feel better, you’ll have more patience and less anxiety. And with my approach you won’t feel deprived or isolated in the process. So if you’re interested in learning more about all the details, please go to www.sobrietystarterkit.com. You can start at any time and I would love to see you in the course.
I went downstairs like I said total blank the night before and went into the living room and saw something that like kind of haunts me to this day. Basically, my stocking was full. My kids’ stockings were sort of half full, less than half my husband’s stocking was empty. And the reason was, I was the person who had been gathering all of the stocking stuffers for most of the year. I mean, I I’m a prepared girl I think ahead so every time I saw something that I thought would be cute for my husband or cute for my kids are kind of fun from Santa, I would gather it up and hide it in my office. And I had gone to bed without filling the stockings like God knows who put out the cookies or ate the cookies for Santa or ate half the carrots for Rudolph or whatever it is, but it was not me. So my husband, I don’t even know what he would think of this had done what he could with what he had. And I woke up and my kids were already down there. My husband was our it down there literally could not fill the stockings and just that shame of looking at that and knowing that I kind of got drunk and passed out and didn’t fill my kids stockings, what I’ve been preparing for months, and my husband’s stocking was empty. That was just like, shame. That sucks. And beyond that, I felt like total garbage. Like, I was trying not to puke on Christmas morning, and we’re sitting around with coffee and coffee cakes, and the kids are young and they’re jumping all over me and just the amount of just, I can’t, self-loathing maybe, that I felt shame and defensiveness and resentment. I’m not even sure why I would be resentful, but it somehow made me feel less bad to be pitied other people, it sucked.
So when you think about my story about Christmas Eve, my first year of sobriety, being hard, nowhere near as hard as blacking out and feeling like garbage and not filling the stockings and trying to figure out how bad it was and sort of looking at my mother pretty sure she’s like judging me or whatever, because I’m judging me. And my husband clearly was disappointed but didn’t say anything. Right. Like, I’m sure he tried to wake me up and couldn’t the neighbor of course he did. Right. I was just fucking passed out and couldn’t feel my kids’ stockings.
So Christmas Eve with my husband and my mom. Yes. They drank a bottle of wine. Yes, I was pissed. And I kind of wanted to wring their necks. Yes, I was sensitive about something my mom said in the car and I cried on Christmas Eve. You know what else happened? I had friends to text with my husband came up and comforted me and told me I was amazing. My kids, I put them to bed, and they were so excited about Christmas. The next day, I was part of putting out the cookies. I was part of putting out the carrots. I ate some of the cookies, right? Tried to leave a tiny little bit like Santa would, but like they were pretty good. I drank the milk. I filled the stockings. My kids came in in the morning and I felt great. Which you know, if you’ve been hungover, the contrast is amazing. I felt alive. I felt happy. I felt proud of myself. But coffee was incredible. I didn’t have a fucking headache. We open presents. I didn’t want to like not be in any photos. I was taking the photos. We’re those weird people who wear the Christmas pajamas. We looked ridiculously cute. Just kidding. In my own mind.
After you know, the afternoon, I went for a run on Christmas Day, right? Instead of like self-loathing like that was good. So like, yes, not drinking is hard. You know what? Drinking is hard to drinking. It’s fucking hard. And the pride and the joy you feel when you get through a few of those uncomfortable incidents. It’s amazing. So if you’re on the 23rd, the 24th, the 25th and you’re having a big dinner, like think about that, right? Like, the first 20 minutes of anything are the most uncomfortable, eat something. Hunger is a huge trigger. Get yourself something else something special to eat, or to do or whatever, like, yeah, do the hot cocoa bar, get the peppermint candy, go on a long walk, take a bubble bath, do a face mask, remove yourself from the situation for an hour or two. That’s okay. drive your own car, get there late, leave early, set some boundaries. But don’t give up on yourself. Because you deserve better. You deserve to feel proud of yourself. The other thing I’m going to say is, a lot of times we build up events when we’re gonna drink to way better than they actually are. And in retrospect, we think it’s going to be fun. And amazing. Because we’re drinking, we think it’s gonna suck if we don’t drink and like we’re denying ourselves something and like, we deserve to drink. And the reality is very, very different than what you imagine.
And here’s one that stands out for me. So my kids were around, we got a hall pass. My mother in law was staying with us and our good friends. We’ve been friends for years. With our kids. We’re having sort of a sleepover, New Year’s Eve party, right? Which is crazy. Like we’re adults with kids. So like Mike and I were going to this party at our good friend’s house and we were going to sleep over like zero kids. It was after Christmas. I think it was yeah, it was New Year’s Eve right. Big tree had not done this, and I was beyond excited. So I got all dressed up or I said goodnight to the kids. We were Like, going to go party with our good friends and got their you know me start started drinking right open the wine open the champagne. This is a party. Here’s what I know. I definitely did not make it to midnight. I don’t remember a lot of it at all. I woke up in the guest bedroom the next day with yet another hangover my life sounds really exciting, doesn’t it? I don’t remember. I don’t remember when I got sloppy. I don’t remember if I started slurring. I don’t remember if I went to bed or my husband put me to bed. I don’t remember if I embarrass myself in front of my friends. Or if they were like, where’s Casey, what happened? I remember waking up feeling awful and having to sort of slink upstairs and get the OJ and pretend I’m not feeling ill and like, try to catch up on what happened the night before whether I was there, and I just don’t remember it or not. I know my husband had no one to Kiss at Midnight. That’s what I know. So like, that was my big amazing drinking out on a hall pass. You know what I do now that I’m not drinking on New Year’s and I actually truly love it.
We have a new tradition. So in leading up to New Year’s Eve, I create a vision board every year. And I am a huge vision board fan. I actually if you’re interested, I did an entire episode about manifesting the share of life and creating vision boards and how they can help you envision what you want to bring into your life in the new year. Keep it front and center. Help you experience new things, fire up your imagination and bring you joy with vision boards. And that episode was number 37. So I think if you go to Hello someday coaching.com forward slash 37 It is a great one to listen to between Christmas and New Year’s like I promise you, it will get you excited. A lot of people have told me that the like manifest the shit out of Life Episode is their favorite. And in there, you’ll find out how to get my free vision board kit. So it’s 100 pages of inspiration and quotes and things that you could think about and go through and look at which one speak to and cut them out and put them on a push board and really set your mind right for the new Year. So New Year’s Eve these days. I vision board like I’ve got all my quotes. I love it. I set up my pushpin board, I do it with my daughter. I do not let her work on my vision board. I let her create her own. I cut stuff out I drink my groovy Prosecco or my gruvi, bubbly Rosé we have music going. For some reason my son years ago when he was three, he said he wanted a birthday cake for New Year’s Eve. So now we make a birthday cake every year, which actually tastes really good. And then when we’re about ready to go to bed, I love these things that you could probably order off Amazon now and get them to arrive before New Year’s. It’s called Flying wish paper. And we do it every year. And it’s like the super thin paper you get in a pack. I forget whether you get like 16 or 12 or 20. I don’t know how many sheets of paper, you take a pencil and you write your wishes on it. And so my mother in law is usually there for New Year’s Eve. So we each me my husband, my mother in law, my son, my daughter, six of us, we each get three wishes, three little pieces of paper. And then we get three for the universe, right three joint wishes. And so we write them down. And you know, you wish for anything you want to in the New Year anything at all. And then we share what our wishes are. And we turn off all the lights and we crumple up the flying wish paper and the new sort of roll it into like a funnel and stand it up. And then we light them on fire. It’s totally safe with a little like lighter match. And so what happens is the fine wish paper with your wish, sort of catches on fire and then it burns down a little bit and then it lights up into the air and it goes flying. And so with all the lights off, we give my kids like a little cup and they try to catch the ashes in it and it’s exciting when it goes up in the air. And we all share our wishes for the new year and then we get to put in three for the universe like health and happiness or peace or no more fucking Coronavirus or vaccines or whatever it is. And it’s lovely. It’s lovely. And then we watch fireworks and we cuddle up in our PJs with sleeping bags outside and we go to sleep. I gotta tell you, that is a shitload better than not knowing how I went to bed infront of my friends. Not remembering anything about the night and being embarrassed around my husband and having to apologize and all that shit and feeling like total crap, right? Like just feeling physically ill. Those two new year thieves, I wouldn’t trade my sober one in all the world for my drinking one, right. And part of that is just clearly looking at it. We think it’s going to be amazing when we’re drinking, but how was it really, and then also looking at like, you’re not going to have an amazing new year’s eve, if you just sit there watching people drink and being bummed and feeling deprived, like, it takes a bit of effort, you need to plan a little bit you need to be like, you don’t what would be fun for me, X or Y and your New Year’s Eve does not need to look like my New Year’s Eve.
It can look totally different. But like, brainstorm a little bit, right? This is your night. And because you’re not drinking, you don’t have to sit around with like a sour look on your face. And be bored in your mind and glare at people who are drinking. You can choose to do things with them that aren’t drinking, you can rent a cabin, and go snowshoeing and just bring hot cocoa like that is fun and amazing. You can go sledding for the day and come home and watch a family movie. You can do a spa night at home to get your skin ready for the New Year’s like, I don’t know what it is. But like you can do something wonderful. So I really encourage you to do that to contrast or look with clear eyes about, “how fun” and amazing your drinking holidays really were. And not just the night, look at the mornings. And then contrast it to like, how incredible could it be to be fully present and joyful and fun and do things like on your bucket list that you always said you were going to do but never did. Because you started drinking early and never got around to it and create a vision board, I promise you that you will love it. And you can go to my website, you can go to the podcast episode about Manifesting The Shit Out Of Life. Again, that’s number 37. And I will have a link on that podcast show notes to get your free vision board kit. And it’s actually really, really awesome. So that’s my advice for getting through this week. I know it’s not going to be easy, but it is going to be good. And it can be a lot easier. If you know, maybe think of an alternative to an alcohol, heavy gasoline, change some things if you usually go over to a party for drinking for hours, maybe go for a little bit and then plan something different afterwards or say oh, we really wanted to go for a hike this year. So we will show up from X to Y or we’re going to go do this thing as a family or I want to do this thing for myself. Like you can schedule a massage for New Year’s Eve that would be amazing. And come to a party after your amazing massage right like break it up. Have another plan.
When you go bring your own alcohol-free beverages. I cannot emphasize this enough. And it can be anything. I personally love athletic Brewing Company nonalcoholic beer. I love to partake nonalcoholic beer. I love gruvi nonalcoholic Prosecco or nonalcoholic bubbly Rosé. I know other people just love sparkling water with cranberry and lime. I did an entire podcast episode on The Best Non-Alcoholic Drinks with Laura Silverman from Zero Proof Nation. So go check that out. But like, there is time to buy some awesome nonalcoholic drinks. Tell at least one person in your life that’s going to be around that you’re not drinking so they can support you don’t leave it to chance. And you might break down and ask them and say screw it. I want to drink. And you know what if you do that, like don’t listen to you, you’re not drinking. You know, it’s not their job to police you but if you put it out there, you’re a lot less likely to try to pull that move and trust me, I get that move. I’ve been there. It’s natural. But if you plan something in advance, if you tell someone if you put it out in the world, it makes it a lot easier. Take some breaks, right? Some people just go to the bathroom and like text someone or take some quiet time walk outside like be one of those people who’s like I just want to look at the stars on this gorgeous night. I don’t know. Right? Like, I just wanted to walk and look at the trees at this House, it’s so beautiful. Like people would think you’re mysterious and deep, I don’t know. Just take breaks. And then remember you can leave early. Also, just try to get through the first 10 minutes, the first 20 minutes. Don’t go in hungry, eat before you go there and get a drink in your hand as soon as you can. That way, they won’t be sitting around asking you if you want to drink over and over again. And then remember that joy comes in the morning, it really does. You’re trading your fuzzy boozy night for waking up with pride, and excitement and a clear head and sort of joy in the morning and in your coffee or tea and in the sun coming in. And it is lovely. It truly is peaceful and lovely.
So if you’re listening to this, if it’s the day before Christmas Eve, Christmas Eve Christmas, leading up to New Year’s, I’ve got you, you can listen to this again, you can listen to this again, and you can have me hold your hand. I’ve done two different episodes on getting through the holiday season and parties without alcohol one was with Jean McCarthy, and another one was with a Sober Girls Guide. So you can go back and listen to either one of those. And then you can also listen to my Manifesting The Shit Out Of Life Episode, which was number 37, which I think you would really love. So tap into resources.
The last thing that I want to share with you that I want to say is that I really encourage you to take advantage in this next week, there are literally only like eight days left seven days left to jump into my special offer for The Sobriety Starter Kit Course for the end of the year. So for the next eight days, you can join the sobriety starter kit course which is my signature Sober Coaching Course that takes you through my 4 Step Framework For Quitting Drinking. With that has eight modules 50 videos, it is super positive and proactive, and step by step and will really help you stop drinking, figure out how to take it day by day how to build a life you love, how to navigate tricky situations. So you can get that entire course and save $100 On the January price of the course in the next eight days. You will also if you’ve joined now get invited to a live two-hour kickoff with me for the course for the new year for this journey in your life. That’s going to be on January 9, and it is a Sunday and it will be two hours that day.
If you cannot attend, don’t worry, you will get a recording of the live kickoff, but it is going to be fun. And it’s going to be a real boost to starting your new year alcohol free. It will get you excited to keep on going. And I’ve never done it before. So this is something that you will get with this Friday Starter Kit that is new.
So if you want to join the course in the next eight days, if you want to save the $100 and you want to attend the live kickoff with me go to www.sobrietystarterkit.com. I am really excited for you for the year ahead. I think 2022 is going to be good for you. And I want you to get all the support you need to get started. All right. Happy holidays. I’m rooting for you.
So thank you for coming on here. I couldn’t appreciate it more.
Thank you for listening to this episode of The Hello Someday Podcast. If you’re interested in learning more about me or the work I do or accessing free resources and guides to help you build a life you love without alcohol, please visit hellosomedaycoaching.com. And I would be so grateful if you would take a few minutes to rate and review this podcast so that more women can find it and join the conversation about drinking less and living more.